Final Years Reviews

I got this book when my 98 year old mother was dying. We had been through several years of anticipating her death and grieving because she was in pain and life just would not leaver her.  I found the stories difficult to read when we were in the midst of the agonizing period and right after her death, but now I find the book so VERY helpful, and I wish I had had it five years ago when the long path of mother’s decline started.  I am so glad I have read it so I can help MY children not to experience some of the things that make grief and loss so much more difficult.  In this book I found stories of very different experiences, which Dawn Kairns, a therapist, has carefully chosen to give the reader a full experience of how difficult the final years with a parent can be from so many different psychological standpoints and views of life. More than anything, I grew deeply appreciative that my mother had planned ahead so that the funeral was pre-arranged and pre-paid according to her wishes. She had all the legal papers in order so that her life would not be medically prolonged.  And more than anything, which I learned from reading the experiences in this book, we as a family were so blessed that through our lives our parents had taught us that family love and cooperation is the most important gift they could give us and the most important inheritance we could have.  Doctors and Hospice said over and over how blessed we and our dying mother were that we had in writing and  followed her wishes exactly and did not question them. We were told by all the professionals that in most families one member caves in and fights the rest in order to prolong life artificially.  I recommend EVERY family to read this book and learn what you can do to help yourself when you face your parents’ final years and what you need to do to help your children as they face your final years.  An EXCELLENT book! Thank you.
– Bonnie Neely, Real Travel Adventures Magazine